Brianne Blogs?

Since Maren is here, Everyone has been spending a lot of time together, just like in the good ole days of our youth. It’s been so great for us all to be together for long periods of time and to know that we can see eachother any time we want. More than once during the last few weeks since Maren’s arrival, the phrase “I missed Everyone” has been uttered.

Our first everyone activity was the week Maren was here to interview for her job.

We went to Bourbon Street for happy hour and aligator burgers (yum!) and then went to help Zak get a new chair for his apartment. Below is the very strange chair that we got rid of that looks like it’s comfortable (it isn’t) and looks like it lays down for sleeping (it does not).

The day Maren moved here, Zak came over so Everyone could spend their first official day of living in the City together. First we looked at Maren’s new room (our loft).

Then we did some drinking, ate a chinese feast and played some cards. Good Everyone times.

This weekend for Everyone Day, we took a stroll from our apartment to the park and wandered around in it’s Saturday glory.

Maren and Zak had never been to this part of the park which is the part that shows up in all movies.

Then we took another stroll over to FAO Schwartz the toystore because Zak and Maren had never been.

We spent a long time in here for people who didn’t have kids and weren’t planning to buy anything.

We had to go up the escalator twice to capture Maren with these Lego Harry Potter characters.

Oh, and to enable her to put on her witch’s hat. That was important.

After our toystore fun, we walked to Grand Central station because Maren had never been there and it’s a sight to behold.

We went to the Transit Museum Gallery there and learned a lot about the Subway and got souvenirs. I got a pair of subway map socks. Maren got a subway map mug and Zak got subway playing cards.

After this afternoon of great fun, we went to an outdoor mexican restaurant with $3 margaritas (yeah!) and then took the long walk home where we played Wii bowling, peanuts, drank wine and wathed the pilot episode of Alias. It was a long day of fun for Everyone.

Alas, due to scheduling conflicts, there will be no Everyone Day this week. I know what you’re thinking and you’re right-the worst has happened. If we survive until next week I’ll be sure to tell you what we do then.

I know you have already seen my list of my favorite (as in hottest) celebrites. But, I find that my favorite athletes is a very different list and I thought I’d share it with you now.

My Favorite Athletes in No Particular Order:

1. Ben Roethlisberger-quarterback Pittsburgh Steelers

2. LeBron James-Cleveland Cavaliers

3. Phil Mickelson-glorious golf

4. Andy Roddick-tennis

5. Rafa Nadal-tennis

6. Johnny Damon-Yankees

7. David Wright-Mets

8. The Mannings-quarterbacks/awesome commercial makers

9. The Williams Sisters-tennis players/awesome people!

Now, I’m sure it’s a coincidence that all of these athletes are pretty to look at. But, you must admit that pretty is not the only criteria or else Tom Brady would have been on there and he’s not. I think he’s too pretty but that’s a story for another day.

And because one isn’t fair without the other I give you my

Least Favorite Athletes in No Particular Order:

1. Sergio Garcia-golfer/cry baby

2. Alex Rodriguez-baseball player/drug user/ wife and kid leaver/home wrecker/can’t hit a ball in the post season ass

3. Yelena Jankovic-tennis player and giant cry baby who takes way too many “injury” time-outs

4. Novak Djokavic-tennis player that also takes too many “injury” timeouts and said some really bad things about Andy Roddick the night we were at the US Open-use your head, you don’t insult an American in front of Americans/New Yorks at the US Open!!

5. Kobe Bryant-basketball player/can’t really explain it, just think he’s a bit smarmy and I don’t like him.

6. Tom Brady-quarterback that’s too pretty for a boy, uses more hair products than Brianne and Maren combined and I just can’t bring myself to like him even though I know I should since he’s from Michigan. Sorry.

7. Terrell Owens-football player/guy who never tries to better himself or take responsibility for his actions on or off the field. It’s not the antics that are irritating, I mean Chad Ochocinco is pretty ridiculous but tries to improve his game.

8. Randy Johnson-pitcher who came to the Yankees for big money only to choke under the pressure of the city and help out not at all. Go back to the country!

9. Joba Chamberlain-Yankees pitcher that everyone but me loves. I also think he’s a big giant cry baby who thinks he’s the shit but can’t seem to pitch more than 3 innings in a start. Hmmm…go back to the bullpen where you belong and where Mariano can beat some sense into you.

I have a feeling I’m leaving out some important people on this list. I’ll be sure and update you as I think of them.

There is a great article in the most recent issue of ESPN the magazine about how players have come to identify with their numbers and what the numbers mean to them. The article is really long, so I won’t type it out for you but I will share the first paragraph which is pretty good.

“Back when The Magazine was new, there was a ping-pong table in one of the empty conference rooms. A couple of clearly overworked young editors took to playing a regular lunchtime game, but rather than keeping score in numerals-say, 10 serving 8- they used athletes’ uniform numbers instead. As in Pele serving Berra. (If the score was tied , one player-Larry Bird or Hank Arron-sufficed). If the server couldn’t come up with an appropriate name, he lost his serve, ad once a player’s number was used for the leader’s score, it couldn’t be repeated when the other guy caught up. This all made for minutes of fun, and those young wordsmiths were covinced that their brainchild would soon sweep the nation. (It might have, too, if only they had had better representation).

“Slightly more than a decade later, the ping-pong table is gone, but the editors remain. And like many of their sports-crazed brethren throughout the country, they continue to be captivated by the cult and culture of uniform numbers. Any fanatic worth his face paint can count from double 0’s to double 9’s using jocks instead of cardinals. (That’s Jim Otto to Wayne Gretzky, if you’re scoring at home). What began (more recently than you might think) as a way for fans and reporters to easily identify players on the field is now the fundamental way fans connect with athletes, not to mention the way many jocks identify themselves. From the clubhouse to the bleachers, season after season, numbers are the ties that bind”.

Good stuff, eh? It makes me wish I was a boy and had all players numbers memorized so I could play that awesome version of ping-pong!

In the last week there have been some more good bits of random information that I will now relay to you:

1. Summer is statistically the most hazardous season. Watch out everybody.

2. Pharoah Ramses II died in 1225 BCE. At the time of his death, he had fathered 111 sons and 67 daughters. Obviously the publishers of this caledar hadn’t heard of the Moroccan guy with his 888 kids.

3. Stewardesses is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand. Try it, it’s kinda fun.

4. Tonsurphobia is the fear of haircuts.

5. Corduroy comes from the French cord du roi, or “cloth of the king”.

6. There are more Barbie dolls in Italy than there are Canadians in Canada. Awesome!

Please find below the post from the first day of this year. You need to read it to refresh your memory for the progress report I am going to give you below it.

January 1, 2009 at 9:30 am (general info) · Edit

Today is Monday and it’s also Maren’s first day of work in New York City. That’s right, she has finally decided to reject Canada the way it has long been rejecting her and she is going to live in the City and work here.

For those of you worrying that this means an impending Perrett divorce or some other marriage issue, it does not. Maren and Jeff are both going to live here year-round and Jeff will go back to Montreal in season and Maren will come up to see his games. Aparently, there are several players whose families don’t live in the area. So, no worries on that front.

How excited are we all, as Americans, to have Maren back in the fold?  I mean, weren’t you all secretly worried that they’d close the border and she’d be stuck up there forever? Or that she’d have kids in Montreal and they’d be evil french-speaking little bastards? No, just me? Well, I still think it’s great to have her back in her homeland.

And, how nice will it be for her to be in a place that does not reject her? She wanted a job in Montreal and tried for two years to get one and they wouldn’t hire her. She tries for two days in NYC to get a job and she is welcomed with open arms.

And sure, New York is a bit tougher than Montreal, but when you’re being yelled at by a crazy person on the subway or a rat scurries in front of you or someone tries to poke out your eye with a poorly placed umbrella, at least you know they are all Americans and they all speak English-and yes, i’m willing to bet that these rats speak english-they’re smart little buggers.

Let’s take a minute to really appreicate how great I think this is. In 2000, I moved to Weatherford, Oklahoma to go to college. So that means that for 9 long years Maren and I have had at least an hour, if not 22 between our homes. And now, she’s here. In my city. In my home (for now) and it’s just so great to think about! As if that wasn’t great enough, with Maren moving here, it finally brings Everyone back together again (Brianne, Zak and Maren) like we were in our glorious high school days. I can only imagine the stupid but fun things we will get ourselves into (it’s sort of what we’re good at) and can’t wait. But this time, we have money and no curfews.

So, I’ve just finished another of my Summer of No Substance books. It’s called (take a moment to prepare for the sheer ridiculousness of this title) “Dead Until Dark”. Yes, that’s right. It’s the first book in a series of books about vampires. Yes, vampires. It’s the series of books that the HBO show “True Blood” is based on. Amber got me the series for Christmas, but I had yet to read them.

And, of course, as will all the other fluff so far this year, I liked it. I mean, vampires, small towns, mystery deaths, cemeteries, fangs-what’s better than that? I’m hard pressed to come up with anything right now. I’m really starting to understand the benefit of seasonal reading. I have always seen Pride and Prejudice as a spring book and I read Winters Tale in the winter, but other than that, I have never read seasonally the way many people do. I think I finally get it. I mean, when it’s so humid here in the summer that I fear my hair will suffocate me in the night, I can see how I wouldn’t want to use up too much more energy with thinking about heavy literary topics.

I have found thus far in my reading of nothing of substance that there are some positives to this endeavor:

1. you can read one of these books in a day. if that.

2. i have yet to cry for any of these characters

3. i think i might be sharpening my csi: crime solving abilities as every one of the books i have read so far (even the childrens books) have involved some sort of murder/mystery.

4. now when the rest of the world talks about reading the DaVinci Code, I can join in this book conversation-this ability to communicate with the masses is useful in that i don’t seem to do a lot of things that the rest of the world does. i don’t do facebook, i don’t listen to the radio or watch mtv, i don’t watch american idol. There are people on the covers of magazines that i couldn’t pick out a line-up, let alone guess why they are famous. Point being, maybe having a little something mainstream to discuss isn’t so bad.

Yesterday I was watching this video about this old man who had contributed a lot to special needs children’s education in NYC and he said something that has gotten me to thinking. He said that he has always read everything he can get his hands on because that’s the best way to learn. And damnit, I agree with him. However, in my acquiescence to this point, I think I may have to stop being such a book snob. That’s a terrible thing to let go of and I think it will be difficult, but I’m going to try to broaden my reading horizons. I don’t think this will ever involve a lot of the overly popular books, but I will try not to judge a book before I have read it. I mean, it’s hardly fair. Books in and of themselves aren’t bad. And I certainly don’t want the repuation of being someone who would throw books into a fire if given the chance. Although in the interest of full disclosure, I can think of a great many I’d toss in if I had to make a list.

So you see, dear blog readers, even thought I didn’t plan on it and didn’t mean to, I think I have accidentally learned something from reading fluff.

I think this is a good lesson for us all. After all, what is my blog but pure fluff. There aren’t great discoveries made here or world problems solved and it’s hardly fantastic prose, but if you keep reading, I bet you’ll learn something. I mean, who knew about that guy with his 888 kids?

I just found out something horrible that happened 6 years ago. Gregory Hines, tap dancer and actor beloved by yours truly diedof liver cancer in 2003!

Once upon a time, Meghan told me she was going to a comedy show at Carnegie Hall. I have always wanted to go there and keep forgetting. So that very moment, I started to look at the upcoming Carnegie Hall events. Not really liking any of the summer events, I decided out of nowhere that I would like to see some tap dancing at the Hall for my first visit. So, I looked up the tap dancer, Savian Glover and he is not currenlty on tour. Then I looked up Gregory Hines and was sad to discover that he had died 6 years ago and that it was brand new information to me.

Only Meghan can describe to you fully how upset I was as she witnessed it. I’m not sure why I was so bothered, but I really really was. I mean, I love this guy! He was an awesome dancer and acted pretty well (see Waiting to Exhale, Bojanges the mini-series for which he won an Emmy, Will and Grace, his Tony award winning musical performance and numberous Sesame Street episodes) and an all-around nice guy.

I really hate it when you find out years later that someone you liked has died. It makes me wonder who else I love is no longer with us? And how will I find out? And when will I find out? It’s a rather bummer topic, I know. It’s like at the Oscars when they do that montage of people who have died that year and there’s always someone in there that I didn’t know about, but at least that happens within the year, not 6 years later!

Yes friends, it was time once again last week for our annual Shakespeare in the park outing. This year Meghan and I waited in line next to some very annoying private school pre-teens. But, after several hours of being annoyed, we realized that the best way to get them to stop talking to eachother was to invite them to play a game with us, thus distracting them from their irritating conversation. I’d like to claim the credit for this stroke of genius, but it was a Meghan brainchild and really saved the day.

After getting the tickets, Meghan and I tried to make it to meet Lisa for an IMAX viewing of Transformers. Sadly, by the time we got there we had missed 20 minutes of movie. And I mean 20 minutes of movie, not 15 minutes of previews and 5 minutes of movie. So, lovely Lisa came out of the IMAX version and waited a whole hour to see the regular version of it with us. It was not as good as the first one, but still good-as most action movies are.

Then we three met Maren at Lisa’s for a Thai food feast. We ordered way more food than any 4 people needed and did some good work to eat most of it. In case you weren’t sure-it was yummy.

Then finally back to the park for Maren’s first ever Shakespeare in the park. And boy did she pick a good one. It was the best in the park production I have seen in the 4 years we’ve been going. It was Twelfth Night and starred Anne Hathaway and Julie White.

It was so funny (as is the play when you read it) and so well acted and the music was so good I wished that you could buy the soundtrack.

The only thing to muck up the glory of this great work was that Erica, long missed and much loved Erica, was not there as she usually is to enjoy it with me. I was, however, slightly comforted by her twin sitting two rows in front of Maren. She was wearing an Erica outfit, used Erica hand movements (which, if you know Erica, are very distinct) and even had her hair done in an Erica fashion (buns). It made me feel a little better to have this visual trickery Erica to look at who seemed to enjoy the show. Needless to say, while a great time was had by one and all, we missed our Erica and talked about how bummed we were to have her gone this year.

This week, my class reading was about evolutionary psychology. That is the branch of psychology concerned with how evolutionary influences have led us to current behaviors. One are that this school of thought studies is sexual promiscuity and reproduction.

Hardcore evolutionary psychologists believe that people have sex in order to fulfill the evolutionary need to reproduce and continue the species. Since back in the day, nearly 50% of all offspring died before reaching adulthood, it is genetically programmed into us to reproduce as often as possible. Or so the theory goes.

They gave this interesting example of this practice taken too far.

1. The woman with the most live births had 69 children. Let’s take a moment to think about this. If she was pregnant for 37 weeks (that’s full term) for 69 babies, that’s 53 years ( I said years) of her life that she was pregnant. What?!

3. The man with the record is unbelievable. The male reproduction number is 888. This paragon or parenting was a Moroccan Emperor who had many hundreds of concubines who were only brought to him when they were fertile. I guess he thought he had to single-handedly continue the Moroccan civilization. It makes me wonder if there isn’t a lot of accidental inbreeding in that country since they all seemed to have had the same great-great grandfather.