A Holiday Classic

Yesterday, I sent out my christmas cards for the season and it got me thinking of christmas cards past. Which of course made me think of this classic.

Now, I know you’ve all seen this before, but I realized that it was taken 20 years ago. That’s right, this bad boy is from 1989 and I think it’s only fitting that it get brought back out for it’s 20th anniversary. On a not so awesome note, it makes me feel 100 years old that I have lived 20 years since I wore this home-made dress and stood next to Maren in her matching one. When I told Maren about my discovery, she was also horrified and said that she thinks we’re too young to be able to talk about things that happened 20 years ago. Sadly, this does not appear to be the case. On another note, should I start smiling without showing any teeth? I’ll ponder. Merry early christmas to you all and may you all one day be a part of such an awesome christmas photo card-although I find that highly unlikely!

 

Freud: Three Essays on Sexuality

As promised to several people, I’m going to keep you all updated on the interesting parts of my Psychology of Sexuality Class. For week 2, we are assigned Freud’s Three Essays on Sexuality originally pulished in 1905. The three essays are entitled (1) The Sexual Abberations, (2) Infantile Sexuality and (3) Transformations of Puberty. They look at such varied topics as homesexuality (which he calls inversion), bisexuality, pedophilia, sex with animals, fetishes, sadism and masochism to name just a few. I think the most impressive thing is the ability to cover all of these topics in a mere 109 pages.

Some of the more interesting quotes from these essays are:

“A similar consideration aplies to sexual intercourse with animals, which is by no means rare, especially among country people, and in which sexual attraction seems to override the barriers of species.”

“The most striking distinction between the erotic life of antiquity and our own no doubt lies in the fact that the ancients laid the stress upon the [sexual] instinct itself, whereas we emphasize its object. The ancients glorified the instince and were prepared on its account to honor even an inferior object; while we despise the instinctual activity in itself, and find excuses for it only in the merits of the object.”

“The sexual life of women-partly owing to the stunting effect of civilized conditions and partly owing to their conventional secretiveness and insincerity-is still veiled in an impenetrable obscurity.”

On kissing: “A man who will kiss a pretty girl’s lips passionately, may perhaps be disgusted at the idea of using her tooth-brush, though there are no grounds for supposing that his own oral cavity, for which he feels no disgust, is any cleaner than the girls.”

I think it’s safe to say that this class should prove to be very interesting.

 

Overheard

As suggested by Erica in one of her comments, I submitted the funny thing I overheard at the movie theatre to the always awesome site: overheardinnewyork.com. If you haven’t checked it out, it’s time to do so. I’ll share some recent funny ones with you:

1. Lady with Russian accent to salesperson in outerwear section: I don’t like the style, it’s not feminine. It’s like for soldiers, or Chinese people.

2. Young son: Mom, you know I puke when you make me sit in the back of the bus.
Irritated Jewish mother: Just sit down.
Young son: Then… don’t come crying to me when I throw up on you!

3. Girl on cell: Okay, I’ve got to get naked for my cousin. Bye!
Random passerby: Say what?

4. NYU girl #1: You’re smoking again. You’re a smoker.
NYU girl #2: No I’m not! I only smoke when I’m stressed out in New York.
NYU girl #1: (blank stare)
NYU girl #2, realizing: Shit.

5. Gay guy to girl: He’s so unapproachable and homophobic.
Girl: Honey, he’s not homophobic; he just really doesn’t like you.

6. Ghetto girl #1: Smut. What is “smut”?
Ghetto girl #2: “Smut”? Sounds like “slut.”
Ghetto girl #1: Yeah. I think it’s like “slut,” but for a man.
Ghetto girl #2: Cause it has an “m” for men.

7. Girl: Yeah, like I mean, I would definitely say that I was in the best shape of my life when I had my eating disorder.
Guy, after long pause: Uhhhhh… at least you’re honest!

You should really check out this site. On top of funny things overheard in New York, they have funny things overheard in offices, and by celebrities in interviews. It’s a funny way to waste some time but I also find it a little addictive. So use with caution.

 

More from Philly

Okay, I thought I was done blogging about our Philly trip, but then noticed that there were some pretty funny picutres that I didn’t put in, so I am going to show them to you now.

1. You may be wondering why we took a photo of my hand next to a plant, but it’s so you can see how giant this leaf is that is next to it. I mean, surely this is some sort of giant pre-historic plant from Jurassic Park.

2. When we were walking around Independence Hall, there were about 20 people dressed as Santa walking around with us. Why? We don’t know, but we sure found it interesting. Although not as cool as the giant dinosaur leaf.

3. When Zak and I entered the gameboard park, he told me to look “jaunty” and this is what I opted for. I only wish you could have seen the little hop and arm motion that went along with it.

4. What are we afraid of you ask? Well, we are standing in the giant glass cage that the Liberty bell is encased in, but you can’t tell in our photo because the glass is so clean. So it just looks like we are afraid of Independence Hall which we are not!

Okay, this does officially wrap up your tour of our Philly trip. We had a really great time on our road trip and are planning to be more active in our touring of the Northeast while we live here.

 

Hair Dare

As you all know, Amber dared me not to cut my hair in the year 2009. And so I have not. Not only have I not cut it, but I haven’t thinned it either, which is something I usually do quarterly so as to stop the madness that is my thick thick hair. But, in order to make sure that I didn’t break the rules on a technicality, I did no thinning of any kind. This means that I haven’t cut my hair since last October. Let’s look at some before and after photos.

December 2008-look at how cute and short it is. And look at those nice little layers. And look at how it’s not attacking me or anyone else.

December 2009-Ahhhh! It’s out of control. It takes up more of the photo than our faces do. I think I could hide a child in the part on the far left of the photo.

I was going to say that my plan was to keep growing my hair after 2009 is over and see how long it can go. But, seeing these photos has made me think that I need to reconsider this notion and that perhaps a haircut in my near future wouldn’t be the worst idea I’ve ever had. I’ll keep you updated.

 

Snow and Other Stuff

Today’s post is a gathering of random information from me to you:

1. Do you see the snow falling on my blog? Thanks to WordPress, I can make it snow on this blog from now until January 4th. Why January 4th? I can’t say, but I’m sure excited about it. Please enjoy.

2. Jeff and Maren packed up their Montreal apartment on Saturday, drove it to New York on Sunday and unpacked it all into my apartment. (I guess I should now say our apartment). I haven’t seen it yet as I am at work, but am told that there is a walkway among the boxes leading from the front door to our bedrooms and from the bedrooms to the bathroom. I was specifically told that should I get up in the middle of my sleep to pee that I won’t have to be on my guard for things that I might run into. While I’m not pumped about the unpacking and moving of things that this turn of events brings, I’m excited for Jeff to be here and his flat screen tv and our new couch! Don’t worry, pictures to follow.

3. Last week I painted the kitchen. Well, sort of. I painted as far as my short self could reach as there is no step stool or chair of any kind in the house and as far as the small can of paint that I bought would last me. I hope to finish painting this week, so I’ll post pictures of that as well. For now, you get to know that we are going from the color “buttercup” to the new awesome color “Caribbean cabana”.

4. Do you remember when I had that rash of unfortunate and bloody papercuts last month? Well, last night as I was paying my electric bill and licking the envelope, I papercut my upper lip with the envelope. To say that this hurt would be accurate. I can only pass along this tip: Use caution when licking envelopes. The lips do not like to be cut. It also created a problem later when I ate some popcorn and drank some orange juice. Not a good snack choice for me.

5. Today is my first day of a new semester and my first day in my Psychology of Sexuality class. How excited am I about this? Well, it’s one of the reasons I chose this degree because I thought it sounded like a very interesting class. The main textbook for this class is called “Exotics and Erotics: Human Cultural and Sexual Diversity”. The only bummer about this class is that I have to pick my final paper topic by Thursday. I really hate it when they make you pick your final paper topic so early in the class, even before you’ve actually done any research or learning. But, I’ll muddle through and try to pick something interesting like cultural differences in prostitution practices. How great does that sound?

6. I arrive in Oklahoma in 13 days. And I was just thinking that I will have seen some of you Oklahomans three times in the year 2009! What? It’s like I live there again. Three times in one calendar year! It’s almost too much.

7. I forgot to mention one of the best parts of the Philly trip which was that Zak and I found a Sonic on the drive back and had breakfast there. Is there anything better than a breakfast burrito and a vanilla diet coke? The answer is no my friends.

8. I also forgot to mention this funny exchange I witnessed while waiting for Zak outside the movie theatre on 42nd street on Thanksgiving Day:

          Kid: “I want to see Twilight”. 

          Dad: “I wouldn’t see that if my life depended on it. If I had to choose, I would choose to die”.

9. They lit the Rockefeller Center christmas tree last week and I can’t wait to take Maren and Jeff for their first-ever viewing of it.

10. Speaking of christmas trees, Zak and I put up the tree in my house on Friday and it’s just as lovely as I remembered it. We decided to go with a theme this year which is “tree bling” since we used mostly glittery/gold ornaments. It’s pretty great. When we have everything from the Perretts big move unpacked, I’ll take its picture and show it to you.

11. Hello, this is so important, I can’t believe I didn’t mention it sooner! My final project in my statistics class kicked so much ass that it brought my 76% that I had been carrying all crappy semester long up to an 82% which means that I won’t mar my college transcripts with my first ever C. I can’t describe to you the noise of joy I made when I saw this, just knowing there was one is probably enough. I’d also like to point out how funny it is that I’d be so pissed if I got an 82 in any other class, but in this class, I consider it a moral victory.

Well, I think that’s all of the random life information I have to share for the day. Enjoy the complimentary snow.

 

Philadelphia Part II

Zak and I checked into our hotel room only to be shocked by how nice it was. Now, keep in mind that Zak and I don’t travel fancy. We stayed in hostels throughout Europe and rejected several Philly area hotels because the pictures on the websites were “too fancy”. So, imagine our shock when the hotel we choose was way above our standards. Our room had a breakfast bar, walk-in closet, linen closet, kitchen with dishwasher, large lovely bathroom, two beds, flatscreen tv and office area. What?! This place was one million times nicer than my first NYC apartment and Zak’s current dorm room studio.

After our shocked look at our lodgings, we headed out for a stroll around downtown Philly to see the famous LOVE sign.

Then we went to this outdoor game board park with it’s large Sorry pieces, Monopoly pieces, dominos and bingo chips. We’re not sure what motivated this awesome thing to happen, but we thought it was awesome.

These are photos of us with a former Philadelphia mayor.

You know, Philly makes me think that NYC doesn’t have enough statues of people. We really need to step up our game.

After our stroll, we headed to a magical place literally called the Magic Gardens.

It’s an entire space indoors and outdoors that is all mosaic glass.

It’s hard to describe but spectacularly awesome.

This is where the night gets blurry as we then spent the next 5.5 hours in a pub, drinking and enjoying Philly cheese steaks and watching football. Can you think of a better way to end a day? I can’t.

 

The Three Musketeers

The other day at work I finished my book earlier than anticipated and thus did not have my handy back-up book with me. While this may seem like no big deal, in Brianneland, this is a crisis. So, I looked to my employer’s shelves and decided to try the classic, The Three Musketeers. Having only been acquainted with this story by the classic Disney movie starring Oliver Platt and Keifer Sutherland, I was quite shocked by the actual book but not shocked to learn that Disney made their version a little lighter and more family friendly. There’s a lot of death, both expected and unexpected. There are a great many duels and swordfights and battles. The characters and stories are all darker than I expected. With all that said, it was somehow a light book. Dumas manages to make the occassional side comment to the reader that is both funny and charming and made me feel like someone was telling me the story rather than me reading it. I loved this book and I’m so glad that I accidentally read it. The back of the book called it “the best sword and cloak book ever written” and while I can’t say as I’ve read any others, I’m inclined to agree. If you have some  spare time for a classic, pick this one up if you haven’t read it yet. Definately worth it.

 

A Conspiracy Theory

Let’s take a moment to discuss something very strange that has been happening in my apartment. For three years, every single pot holder that has come into my home has disappeared in a mysterious fashion. Gone. Each one. Vanished. This has long puzzled me and Meghan (when she lived there). I mean, it’s not like we threw them away. It’s not like we misplaced them. They just vanished. Into thin air. This has long bothered me and I have long held the theory that someone comes into the house and only takes random things. Things that you’d notice but not take seriously. Like oven mitts. However, I think this mystery prankster has recently stepped up his game and I do not appreciate it. For you see, the remote to the television is missing as is the battery charger for my camera. In fitting with his oven mitt modus operandi, he takes things that are minor and that you would just assume you had misplaced. However, last week Zak and I searched like fools for the remote. He lifted all the furniture, I looked under the radiators, in the kitchen and several other places that the remote shouldn’t be, all to no avail. The same holds true for my camera charger. So, I finally decided that my mitt thief has escalated (like most criminals do) to small electronics thief. I can only assume that phone chargers, the cable box remote, oven timers and i pods are no longer safe in my home. If I was clever with the electronics, I could set up a camera that only switched on when someone entered the front door and just took a photo of the person. That way I would know the evil thief as he would be the person that isn’t Brianne, Maren or Jeff. Hmmm..something to think on. So, evil stealer of my inconsequential things, if you read this blog, know that I am on to you and that I will not rest until I figure out who you are and make you rue the day!

 

Philadelphia Part I

Over the weekend, Zak and I decided to take a trip since we both had the whole weekend off for the first time in forever. We decided to take a mini-trip to see a city we had never seen but that is so close to New York. So, we looked up some options and decided to go to Philadelphia which is less than two hours away. Maren let us take her car so we got to have an awesome road trip! Thanks Maren. We started our day in Philly with a trip to the Mutter Museum. This is a museum of medical oddities with babies in jars and preserved parts of strange anatomy and a piece of John Wilkes Booth’s spine. This place was awesome. We absolutely loved it. We learned a lot and it was cool for me to see what a lot of medical conditions looked like on different parts of the anatomy. The coolest thing was that this museum had in it something Meghan and I once watched a discovery channel special about. There was this woman who died and on her autopsy they found a stone baby in her abdomen. It was a baby that she had carried then it had died but it stayed inside her for 24 years and calcified so that it was literally stone when they took it out of her. The amazing thing is that she had two children with this stone baby inside of her. Anyway, it was cool to see something in person that I had seen on TV.

         

After the Mutter Museum we headed over to see Independece Hall and the Liberty Bell. You know, the traditional Philadelphia stuff. We made sure to take photos with all the founding fathers we could find.

One of our favorite statues was the Signer. It is a statue that is a tribute to all those who signed the constitution. Although why it isn’t a statue of a person signing anything is beyond us. Lisa thought it looks like the statue is signing into a microphone.

We thought it would be a good idea for each of us to pose like the statue. We’ll call it our tribute to the signers of the constitution.

On the walk to the Liberty Bell, there are stones along the way showing people who contributed to the building of the area. Our favorite was this one below that listed this man’s profession as “gentleman”. Now, for those of you who don’t read a lot of Jane Austen/Bronte sisters novels, you might not know that in those days the most fashionable of men did not have a profession and were instead called “gentleman”. In fact, it was often shameful to rich families for their children to take on professions, even jobs like doctor and lawyer reflected negatively upon the family name. Gentleman seems to have meant a lot of family money and fancy suits and living the dream in that fashion. Let’s face it, being a gentleman was once a lot more awesome than it is today.

Below is Independence Hall as seen from the glass enclosure of the Liberty Bell.

Before you get to the Liberty Bell, there is a long enclosure with a history of the Bell and other interesting Bell facts. With the Bell facts came these photos the Zak and I decided to recreate in our own Bell photos.

After the historical area of Philly we checked into our hotel and then headed out to the more modern parts of the city. Photos and stories to follow in Philadelphia Part II.